My Anxiety Could Never
There’s much to be said on the Internet about opening a store (so fun! so easy!). Ahem. But there isn’t much to be said about closing a store, so here are my thoughts on closing a retail location.
BROTHA. It’s a lot of work. It’s like moving your house except with your house, you aren’t explaining to people all day why the house looks empty and is full of boxes. And you aren’t telling every single soul who will stand in front of you for at least five seconds that you are just consolidating houses and to please be sure to come visit your other house located three miles away.
And while most people were pretty interested in all of the details of our move, there were a few who just came to say goodbye because they would not be driving over to West to see us again because it is “too far away”. And while I was awake at 3 am considering that statement, I thought well…this isn’t New York City and three miles away via Providence and Stadium isn’t too terrible., right? But mainly I was thinking WHAT IF EVERYONE FEELS THIS WAY? Good times, indeed.
I spent a significant portion of August selling things we didn’t need or want any longer and moving over as much as possible before our movers came last Friday. They moved all the big equipment and all the work tables. All I can tell you about that endeavor is this: my assumption that you can roll a 1,000 pound oven up a U-Haul ramp is outrageously incorrect. That sort of thing requires a truck with a lift gate. Who knew?
(As a side note, when I pulled into my spot behind Nifong on Friday morning, there was a pallet jack laying on the ground and I thought “oh, I didn’t know we would need one of those”. And then later there was some random guy sitting on the ground performing repairs on the pallet jack and our mover said he didn’t know the guy or the pallet jack. And that guy worked on that thing for like SIX HOURS while we were loading cars and trucks multiple times and never even really looked at us despite sitting in the absolute middle of an orchestrated process. My anxiety could never.)
Here’s a pro tip: when looking for a retail space, pick one that has a double door entry and then measure the door frame to ensure that the frame isn’t approximately 1/16th of an inch shorter than all of your existing refrigerators and freezers. Look at all available retail spaces until you find one that has that sort of perfect door. If you don’t, you won’t be really aggrieved when you move in because it’s all so exciting and part of the process. But when you move out, you will be beyond annoyed. And if you find the perfect space and the door frames are too short, trust me when I say it is absolutely not worth it. Niche, but true.
Follow me for more moving tips. Or don’t, since I thought a U-Haul was the way to go.
