I don't know about you, but back-to-school is making me feel a little inadequate.  My Facebook feed is full of kids holding up adorable chalkboard paintings announcing their new grade level.  My Pinterest page is full of bento box repins, most featuring sandwiches cut into animal shapes and fruit kabobs.  SIGH.  I have no idea how people keep up with this, because I'm failing miserably. If you are feeling a bit like the whole world is perfect and you aren't, here is a whole list of things I messed up today.  WELCOME TO THE CLUB.  YOU ARE WELCOME.

  1. I left the cornstarch out of the German Chocolate pies because I was thinking about something that may or may not ever become a thing for PJP.  I realized it after they had been in the oven for 10 minutes.
  2. The answer to why everything seems burned but not really finished baking is that 425 degrees isn't 350 degrees.  And it won't ever be.
  3. Gunner has worked for us for five days and still doesn't have a time station login.  This must reassure him like you can't even imagine.  (And Gunnar...and OSHA, if you read this...we are totally writing down your hours and plan to pay you in accordance with all federal, state, and local laws.)
  4. We threw away an entire tray of blueberry pies today because they were too juicy.  How does that happen?  And why?  Super irritating.
  5. Our box of pie tins have been held up in Reno since Friday.  Unless they are filing for a quickie divorce, I don't know what they are doing there.  Honestly, FedEx, I could have driven them from Reno to Columbia on my own in less time.  I needed you today, box of pie tins.
  6. One customer ordered 2,760 jelly jar pies to be picked up this weekend and early next week...which is AWESOME.  Except then I realized that each of the 460 six-packs needed six baby forks tied with a ribbon and bow.  And then Jeanne and I had a big disagreement on the meaning of "bow".
  7. Let's just say that one person ties pretty bows.  And the other one of us writes the blog.  Ahem.
  8. I just realized that I'm about 61 ounces short of the recommended daily 64 ounces of water per day.  If coffee is made with water, can we just all agree it counts just the same?
  9. I was 10 minutes late to back-to-school night because I was on an important phone call.  Parent of the year, indeed.
  10. We all had Jimmy John's for dinner.  See #9 for reference.  Winning.

Cheers to tomorrow.  Right?